I have to give a handshake to the people at Maxis for making nice software for us all to play god. Course, I’m talking about the Sims games. Last night I decided to make life hell for 8 random sims in Sims 2 by holding a Sim Survivor Deathmatch. Rules are simple.
- Eight Sims
- No doors to the outside world
- Minimal Provisions/comforts
- Last Sim alive wins
Let’s meet the cast.
From Left To Right
- Arturo: Crazy old scottish looking ass clown.
- Samson: Token black guy.
- Gretchen: Old gray haired hag in the running suit.
- Donnie: Villian from Fifth Element.
- Jeb: Redneck.
- Faye: Pink Top, Chubby ass.
- Yelena: Kneeling sweater meat.
- Haike: Swiss Miss.
For a while, the contestants just danced, chatted, pissed their pants, and smelled real bad. Then some unknown sim decided to use the oven and forgot about the food. The first round of “Voting out” was about to begin.
After the kitchen incident, only Haike, Yelena, Gretchen & Jeb remained. The fire must have left the place smoldering hot since they all proceeded to strip down to their undies. Except for Gretchen, who is a cold ugly witch and keeps herself in nice warm jammies. Since there were no more sources for fire left, death will have to be dealt by other means. The next day would be a trying day.
I guess it just goes to show that when you play god, there are no winners, except comedy.