Posted on June 1, 2001 - Nature - 0 Comments
Rogain - The #1 Evolution Suppressor

It is kind of hard in these times to have a day pass where you don't see some type of advertisement on the topic of hair loss. Some are of a person in their youth fearing for a future of being hairless. Yet others are of people who have lost their hair and because of losing their hair, they have lost their self-esteem. Many of these people rely on products like Rogaine to help ease their fears, to regain self-esteem, and to dive into one end of a pool so they can emerge at the other end and give a big smile and thumbs ups. I think these products are killing evolution.

Consider this, back in the days before we had modern humans, there were some hairy ape-people things. I forget the scientific names, it has been a long time since I had anthropology. But anyway, we have these hairy ape-people things that migrate into the grasslands and start standing on two legs in order to see above the tall grass so that they can hunt efficiently. After this happens, the fur on their backs and asses starts to thin and disappear. The hair thinning continues to spread around the body until modern humans come along where the thinning process has only gotten up to the neck and most of the face. Now doesn't it only seem logical that the natural hair loss should be working its way up on top of the head?

Maybe now the balding population won't be at a loss of self-esteem because they have no hair, but would rather be proud that they are further along in the great parade of evolution. Then we could all live happy together until they decide to commit genocide on all of us fully haired folks so that they can wipe out us slow evolvers all together and take over the world as a new super race that has no need for hairspray, barbershops, and shampoo.


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