Hey, Nice Sack!

Posted on October 4, 2001 - Nature - 0 Comments
Kangaroo Scrotum Pouch

Rabbits give us their feet for luck.
Pigs (magically) give us their bodies for three types of meat.
Horses give us themselves for Big Macs, and probably chicken McNuggets.
Elephants give us their legs for wastebaskets.
Minks give us their fur for coats.

Of all the things that we take from animals in exchange for their lives, I think none are getting more screwed over than the kangaroo. From them, we take their scrotums to make sacks. (no pun intended) Some animals, like bovines, give their skin so that that sexy pop star call look good with it stretched onto her thighs. Others, such as the white-tailed buck, give us their antlers for the great task of making guys in really big trucks feel like ‘men.’ These are sacrifices of great importance and honor in our society, but the poor Kangaroo has to sacrifice its junk for the sake of somebody wanting attention from having a unique coin purse. I pity these kangaroos. Odds are their “donation to human society” doesn’t have to be a fatal operation. So they have to live with the fact that their twig no longer has the berries, somebody in that large city that they can see from the top of the hill does have their berries. The worst part being that that person is probably using it as a gag for a really crappy pickup line like “Hey Baby, want to see my scrotum?”


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