The Impossible Realities of Cribbage Board Photos
Have you ever gone through life not realizing that something common was around you at all times? Then one day you take notice of that something and are left with a mind-blowing experience where now notice that something everywhere, and you are amazed how you've never noticed that thing before?
Well, hold onto your spilikins, because we here at 6SO are about to point one out that you possibly never have noticed.
People who photograph cribbage boards have no clue how to play cribbage.
Let that sink in.
Ok. Now that it has sunk in, let's look at some examples of product photos used to sell cribbage boards. Remember, the max score on any given hand is 29 points, and that score is incredibly rare. If you want a complete recap of what scores are possible in cribbage, gamecolony.com has a good overview.
Amazing. Red did the impossible with a 34 point play. But what is even more impressive is how Red got 70 points before the other two players could get 10 points. What is then even more impressive is that Blue tallied up a whopping 83 point hand. Then, to be EVEN MORE IMPRESSIVE, Green comes out of nowhere and drops a big fat 97 POINT HAND. WOW.
Makes you wonder who's zero point hand that is displayed next to board doesn't it? The crib perhaps?
This one is going to take a while to unpack.
At first glance, I thought that just the player using the black colored peg was only using one peg to count their points. But on closer inspection, we can see that the peg getting inserted into the cribbage board is not in the same track as the trailing peg. Thus, this is a three hand game where everyone is only using one peg to score. Not something I would do as I play with a bunch of people who I assume are cheaters but to each their own.
Anyways, showing four hands of cards indicates that board is scoring a three-handed game. One hand per player and the crib, plus the crib cut card, That makes sense and fits within the rules! But, then why do two hands have six cards, and the other two have five when they all should only have four cards?
AND JUST WHAT ARE THE ODDS THAT ALL THREE HANDS PLUS THE CRIB GOT DEALT A STRAIGHT FLUSH?! WOW!!
To be fair, this board's description describes it as a "brain-teasing 3-track board."
Same board, different game. It's nice that this time the players are following protocol and are using two pegs per track to keep score. It is also neat that the players using the black & gold pegs each exchanged a peg so they could each use both colors. How friendly.
But look at those pegging gaps! Middle track black/gold wins the game with an impressive 107 point hand! Quite the comeback given that Silver nearly made it a one hand game with their 116 point hand!
- Is there a region of the world where cribbage players keep score with three pegs?
- Why are Silver and Copper using the same track?
- Is there a region of the world where cribbage players keep score with four pegs?
- Why are Silver and Bronze using the same track?
- Why are Gold and Copper using the same track?
- Why do Gold and Silver only get three pegs while Bronze and Copper get four?
- Is there a region of the world where cribbage players keep score with five pegs?
Surely a cribbage board that earned the right to have get Harley-Davidson's trademark bestowed onto it would only hire the best cribbage experts to photograph the board?
Track 1: Looks legit.
Track 2: Looks legit.
Track 3: Why is there only one peg?
Track 4: WHY ARE TWO PEOPLE PLAYING IN TRACK FOUR?
Again with using three pegs to score.
But imagine that play between Red and Blue. They are sitting there neck to neck at the 41 point mark and Red counts first. "Sixty-three points bitch! Let's see you come back now!"
Blue, holding a perfect poker face while Red gloats then calmly counts out his hand. "...and knobs for sixty-nine... Bitch."
To help further illustrate the epidemic, here are a some more cribbage board photos we found presented with minimal commentary.
Gold: 34 point hand.
Silver: 50 point hand.
Silver: 51 point hand.
Copper: 40 point hand.
Gold: Impossible 27 point hand
Green: 83 point hand.
Red: 85 point hand. Blue: 91 point hand.
Apparently, nobody pegged during the first hand?
Blue and Green are playing four pegs, while Red is playing
Green: 42 Point Hand.
Blue: I don't even know what blue is doing.
This one is subtle, but blue has scored an impossible 26 points.
Green: Impossible 26 point hand.
Red: 47 point hand.
Blue: 91 point hand.
Brown: 92 point hand.